Social Impact Quiz
Diane Wood
The City of Vancouver plans to study the impact of development on the low income Downtown Eastside community. Here are some questions we’d like to see them ask:
1 – How has the opportunity to buy a dozen donuts for $27 improved the quality of your life?
a) greatly improved
b) it hasn’t improved, the line-up is too long
c) it hasn’t improved, I get yelled at by local thugs and wackos
2 – How has the ability to choose from 75 varieties of Brie cheese improved the quality of your life?
a) greatly improved you might even say enriched
b) not all at, I buy a big jar of Cheese Whiz once a month
c) worsened, it was a great place to pick up Korean sailors B4 it became a cheese store
3 – The Starbucks in Tinseltown
a) is a perfect place to work on my laptop
b) is a perfect place to pick butts
c) is a perfect place to get called names by yuppies
4 – Tanning salons
a) are necessary in a city where it rains so much
b) are necessary before I holiday in Mexico
c) combat racism by making us all the same colour
d) should be covered by Welfare; it will get people off welfare if they get cancer and die
5 – Bentleys parked on the street stop will people from pee-ing in doorways
True
False
6 – Condos at Main & Hastings will contribute to eliminating drug addiction
True: because, of course, rich people don’t use drugs
True: only if they build a detox on the ground floor
False: they are buildings, not magic wands
7 – There is a new doggie outfit store in the ‘hood. Do you think that this store….
a) sells items that are way too expensive and unnecessary for me to buy
b) sells items that I would never torture my dog by forcing it to wear
c) sells items that are totally cute, especially if yr pet gets a pedicure to match
8 – The Urban Design Panel said it was very important for new condos to preserve light access to SRO rooms. Have the developers
a) obeyed
b) disobeyed
c) kicked up too much asbestos dust at their construction sites to be able to tell
9 – The Health Care needs of the community will be met by
a) a vet to replace Vandu
b) a pet hospital to replace Insite
c) 24 hour emergency medical services for dogs
d) 24 hour emergency medical care for both dogs and cats
e) new-age doggie therapy to replace Strathcona Mental Health Team
10 – Revitalization means
a) cleaning up the neighbourhhood
b) closing soup kitchen line-ups and food banks
c) filling up the jails
d) social cleansing
11 – Social Housing
a) is for lazy people who don’t want to work
b) is all well and good, but some people want to stand on their own 2 feet
c) is what the government promised us for hosting the Olympics
d) is where I live
